Thursday, August 21, 2008

A Modern Parable

[I'm sharing this incisive eMail sent to me with all of you - Jman]

A Japanese company (Toyota) and an American company Ford Motor) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile. The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 7 people steering and 2 people rowing.

Feeling a deeper study was in order; American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion. They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.

Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 2 area steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 2 people rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the 'Rowing Team Quality First Program,' with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rowers. There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses. The pension program was trimmed to 'equal the competition' and some of the resultant savings were channeled into morale boosting programs and teamwork posters.

The next year the Japanese won by two miles. Humiliated, the American management laid-off one rower, halted development of a new canoe, sold all the paddles, and canceled all capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses.

The next year, try as he might, the lone designated rower was unable to even finish the race (having no paddles,) so he was laid off for unacceptable performance, all canoe equipment was sold and the next year's racing team was out-sourced to India.

Sadly, THE END

Here's something else to think about: Ford has spent the last thirty years moving all its factories out of the US, claiming they can't make money paying American wages. TOYOTA has spent the last thirty years building more than a dozen plantsinside the US.

The last quarter's results: TOYOTA makes 4 billion in profits while Ford racked up 9 billion in losses. Ford folks are still scratching their heads, and collecting bonuses...

IF THIS WEREN'T SO TRUE IT MIGHT BE FUNNY

PS - Author's note: I'm reminded of the space program, when the U.S. spent 6 million developing an "anti-gravity" ink pen so the astronauts could write in zero gravity. The Russians simply used pencils!


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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Anyone Can Be President


To be President, all you need is foresight and a clear vision of America's place in the world.


Subject: Bush-speak

"The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country."
-George W. Bush

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
-George W. Bush

"One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'."
-George W. Bush

"I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future."
-George W. Bush

"The future will be better tomorrow."
-George W. Bush

"We're going to have the best educated American people in the world."
-George W. Bush

"I stand by all the misstatements that I've made."

-George W. Bush

"We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe."
-George W. Bush

"A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls."
-George W. Bush

"We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur."
-George W. Bush

"For NASA, space is still a high priority."
-George W. Bush

"Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children."
-George W. Bush

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
-George W. Bush

"It's time for the human race to enter the solar system."
-George W. Bush


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